Create boundaries for yourself
The key to resilience, says Leandra, is about creating boundaries for yourself. “It’s about having the power to say no when you need to. You can’t be resilient if you constantly say yes, or if you have no sense of boundaries.” This may be not taking on any extra work, guarding the time you need to prepare for an important meeting, or restricting time spent at a screen or on calls.
When you set boundaries for yourself, you create space. Leandra says: “It’s only when we say a really strong no, that we can then say a full yes to when truly want to say yes.”
“When you are pushed beyond your boundaries it’s like pouring from an empty cup. You have to make sure that your cup stays full, so that you have the inner resources to deal with stressful situations. That starts with setting limits for yourself, being aware of when your cup is becoming empty, and catching yourself before you get there.”
But how do you know when you need to say no?
Connecting your body and mind
“We need to shift out of the dominance of the mind and move into remembering the wisdom of the body,” says Leandra. “We often hear about the gut-brain connection and we’re all familiar with the expression ‘gut instincts’. However, we can actually tune into physical sensations that connect us to a deep sense of ‘knowing’.
For me, resilience at work starts with the basic foundation of bringing yourself back into your body and listening to your body’s responses. It’s not sustainable or wise to work only from the mind and to ignore the body. We need to bring both ‘online’.”
Your body is as important and useful as your mind when it comes to making decisions, says Leandra. “When you set boundaries, it gives you space to actually begin to feel what’s going on with your body and your breath, and that builds awareness. For example, if you notice your breath feeling tighter, your heart rate higher or just a sensation in your gut that says ‘this doesn’t feel right to me’, can you be open and curious about those physical sensations? What are they telling you?”
Other symptoms that you’ve reached your limit include snapping, being more irritable or impatient than usual, and losing sleep or food, according to Leandra. Noticing these changes is crucial since it helps us rebalance.
Listening to your body and being aware that you’re in a stress response, will allow you to change it. “As soon as we start to observe the body, the breath and the mind everything shifts,” says Leandra.
Take a breath
The first step towards linking your body and mind, according to Leandra, is to take a deep breath.
Leandra recommends taking a slow, deep breath if you are under stress. Being more conscious of your stress level can allow you to pause and re-calibrate.
Drop your attention to where your body touches the earth as you continue to breathe slowly.
Take note of how your feet are attached to the floor. How are your sitting bones connected to your chair when you’re seated?
Examine your posture: are you slumped or is your back straight? Allow your spine to lengthen and your lungs to fill with air.
“As you connect to your body and allow it to root downwards, you will start to feel more supported,” says Leandra. “From that place you can feel more, make better decisions, as well as express what you genuinely think and feel.”